No, seriously, I am birthing myself again....

Where to begin (don't you hate it when people say that - we know where tostart!)? I am all but done with a fellowship at Arts for Life North Carolina, http://www.aflnc.org/, teaching creative writing to children with cancer and other chronic and sometimes terminal illnesses. It was a short but enriching experience. They trusted me to record a CD project for them that was the ultimate fun!

I got to work with the extremely creative and professional John Cloer of Velvet Rope Productions and The Cloers. He produced and recorded the cd's as well as going beyond what we asked and doing the vivid graphics and sound effects. Visit The Cloers' blog for a sound clip and more information on their work at http://www.thecloers.com/.

CD1:

I learned how to have faith in the kid's ability to handle what they were given. I saw a quiet bravery and a hunger to express in the "patients" as I stumbled for words and held back tears watching them bear what seems to be a crazy fate. Don't get me wrong, many of them are survivors and will go on to lead full, long lives. But they never know. So I hope we helped make their lives full for whatever time they have.

CD2:

Speaking of bearing burdens, during the fellowship I had many personal life adjustments to make due to my bouts with severe bipolar disorder. I had to fight off sharp anxiety and blunt depression while remaining supportive of the children at the hospital and pulling off my other work commitments - school gigs, community programs, private shows, commissioned projects, etc. I am not complaining. We all have challenges and mine are minute compared to so many that never get to express their pain.

Nevertheless, bipolar disorder is what some call a "hidden disability" and although I was originally diagnosed with it 17 years ago, it flares up with stress and lack of personal care. That's what happened this spring. It had been about 4 years since I had gotten this close to feeling the terror that comes with feeling safe in no place, not even in my own home or with my closest friends and family members. I have vowed to myself to live a life not hindered by that, and that meant I had to chill. At least for a hot minute. But I'm back (the minute was scorching, couldn't sit for long)!

The fellowship ended for me May 31, 2009. I am now still doing all those other things that make up my business, CommuniCulture. But because of a stirring in my gut that has been building up since I began to get control over this challenge, I have committed, TONIGHT, to produce a work recapturing my adventures in the land of manic depression. I hope you will come along. Projected production date: Fall 2010. Let me know if you have time or energy that will help make this happen. I'll be posting updates here frequently.

See you then (but hopefully sooner),
Kalicious